(by george gerdes)

She goes steady with the maestro
And she rosins his baton
But when he goes out on a binge-o
She's been known to carry on
When the maestro goes out and paints the town

Maestro he gets very jealous
When she talks to any other man
And the other men's women tend to worry
What's she got to talk about with them?
The women worry 'bout what she wanna do
When she's through conducting her interlude

One time I saw her at the cafe
She was laughin' like she just let down her hair
The time I saw her on the sidewalk
And her face was all flushed and filled with tears
The time I saw her in front of the pet shop
And the maestro and the goose and the ghost were there
The time I saw her on her doorstep
She invited me upstairs
And she gave me a wooded chair
That I sit on in my underwear

I used to play the second fiddle
In her philharmonic hall
But now I look out for numero uno
And I don't play no violins at all
I play the part of the man who crawls the wall

• I Fell in Love
• Keep on Doing What You Do/jerks on The Loose
• Losing True
• On The Road to Fairfax County
• Steady With The Maestro
• The Largest Elizabeth in The World
• The Scorpion Lament
• Want Not Want Not