Announcer: the stars of our show, and america's shiekest couple, eddie sparks and dixie leonard!

James: I remember you.
Bette: I'd like to say that you're in my dreams.
James: you're the one who made my dreams come true
Bette: you're usually dead,
James: a few
Bette: without a head,
James: kisses ago.
Bette: and lots of natives are picking their teeth with your bones.
James: I remember, too,
Bette: oh, what a dream!
James: a distant bell,
Bette: it comes at night and taunts me,
James: and stars that fell
Bette: and, like your jokes, it haunts me until
James: like rain out of the blue.
Bette: I'm blue as your face as the last breath leaves you.
James: when my life is through,
Bette: I'll jump for joy.
James: and the angels ask me to recall
Bette: and when winchell asks me to recall
Who's a chump and a heel.
James: the thrill of it all,
Bette: who's the biggest schlemeil?
Both: then I will tell them I remember . . .
James: so, uh, it's my birthday comin' up.
Bette: yeah, I know, eddie.
James: but, what do you give a guy that's got everything?
Bette: uh, penicillin?
James: hmmm, hey dix? you ever been married?
Bette: oh, yeah, eddie, twice!
James: children?
Bette: no, silly! grown men! tell me, eddie, what's the most romantic thing a woman ever said to you?
James: are you sure you're not a cop?
Then I will tell them I remember . . . you.
Bette: you
James: and you.

• Baby It's Cold Outside
• Billy-a-dick
• Come Rain or Shine
• Dreamland
• Every Road Leads Back to You
• For All We Know
• I Remember You
• I Remember You/ Dixie's Dream
• In My Life
• Stuff Like That There